Pastors Wives: The Joy, the Questions, and the Tears
Anonymous questions sent in by the wives of pastors reveals the depth of pain, loneliness, and uncertainty that they often endure. At our recent Louisiana Ministers Wives Retreat, a panel sought to answer these and other anonymous questions. The name of the Session was “The Joy, the Questions, and the Tears”:
- How do I continue to show love to people who openly disrespect and criticize my husband?
- How do I deal with the anxiety of always worrying about what my husband may say, not say, do or not do?
- How do I address the many different opinions of what is expected of me as a pastors wife?
- How do I know who might be a “safe” friend for me in my church?
- What can I do to find peace as a pastor’s wife?
- How do I live with my church’s expectations of my children?
- How do I address my troubled / rebellious child’s issues with my high expectation church?
Pastors wives are often stand between the flawed, struggling person that is her husband and the flawed, sheep like people that he desperately wants to lead well. She sees his desperation and wants to help him. She sees their demands and wants to protect him. She wants them to know how special he is. She wants to be herself and feel safe among friends as her husband grows, her children struggle, her pain needs an outlet, and the lost need her savior. I’m grateful for my wife who has walked this narrow road with me. She give me great strength in the vulnerable moments of this dangerous calling. Praying for other Minister’s Wives as they walk this narrow path with the God-called men in their lives.