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The Promises of Parental Discipline
Discipline: The Bible’s answer to Three Deep Questions every parent is asking.
This weekend, our church continued studying through the Old Testament book of Proverbs. Specifically, we looked at a couple of dozen verses for parents. Proverbs offers great encouragement and direction for Parents. Some interesting notes that generated some great discussion, were on the topic of discipline.
Three questions every parent is asking in their heart are answered by being a diligent disciplinarian according to Proverbs:
1. How do I show my love to my children?
- Proverbs 3:12 – for the Lord reproves him whom he loves, as a father the son in whom he delights.
- Proverbs 13:24 – Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.
2. How do I assure the success of my children?
- Proverbs 19:18 – Discipline your son, for there is hope; do not set your heart on putting him to death.
- Proverbs 22:15 – Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him.
3. How do I assure a peaceful relationship with my children?
- Proverbs 29:17 – Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will give delight to your heart.
Discipline is a parent’s duty. A duty best administered by a parent, because no one loves and graces a child like a parent can (when they are healthy). Parents must give up the desire to be liked and overlook behavior in a child for peace. Behavior comes from the heart. If unaddressed, the behavior could bring about future harm to the one you love. Parenting means committing to do the hard thing: Discipline our children because we love them, want them to be successful, and want them to know peace and delight us. It’s not easy, but it does produce what we desire for our kids.
- Hebrews 12:11 – No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.
The Dragon Slayer vs. The Fly Swatter
The older I get, the more clearly I can see the big things – DRAGONS TO SLAY – that the little distractions – FLIES TO SWAT – keep me from working on. There are a lot of little flies out there that can keep us distracted from giving our lives to a mission bigger than ourselves & that will outlast this world. I want to live out my life Slaying Dragons & not just Swatting Flies. Here’s a few on my list:
DRAGONS TO SLAY:
- A majority of the world & my community are facing eternity without Christ.
- Discipling & capturing the heart of my kids.
- Loving my wife as I love myself.
- Overcoming my own selfishness & sin so that I can experience personal spiritual growth for myself & others.
- Financial discipline & good stewardship.
- Encouraging those who are losing hope.
- Leading a church that makes disciples & glorifies God.
- Living healthy so that I can be my best for God & my family for the longest possible time.
- Fatherless kids without mentorship.
FLIES TO SWAT:
- What other people think about me, my work, & my tribe.
- The latest gadgets & gizmos.
- “Must see TV.”
- The Facebook Newsfeed. (A swarm of flies of Biblical proportions on there!)
- Taking refuge (beyond just general enjoyment) in the things of this world – food, entertainment, etc.
- Being satisfied with the way things are.
- What people are NOT doing.
- Relying on my own strength instead of God’s power.
- Petty issues that bring divisions between God’s people.
Are you swatting flies or slaying dragons?
Good tip for us parents: You Can’t Bad-Attitude Someone into a Good Attitude
When is that last time someone confronted you in anger and your immediate response was something like, “Oh thank you, I am so motivated now to do better and try harder.” Correction packaged in a bad attitude is not motivating, stimulating, or helpful.
If it’s the kindness of God that leads us to repentance, we would do well to encourage repentance in others the same way.
from Rick Holland
